My substitute is waiting.

 Well, my lad is waiting for the paperwork to be finished and he will step into my shoes.

Its not easy as there are hoops to jump through even now.

Perhaps I will write another book?

You haven't read my other work of art?

"The steering wheel university" by Paul Malone, available on Amazon

Complete with two spelling mistakes.

Here is a story worth telling.

He had a strange accent. Scottish and something else. After a couple of minutes I asked him what he worked at. 

He said I will start at the beginning. My father was killed in a road crash when I was 16 and when I was 21 my mother re married. I did not get along with him and he did not get along with me.

So it was pistols drawn at 50 paces.

They went away for the weekend and the word went out that there was a party at my house and every scumbag in Edenborough arrived at the house. When the police in there droves arrived and cleared the house it was a total wreck. Not really my fault.

But my stepfather put £200 into my hand and told me to get out and not to come back until I had grown up.

So I found a B&B and met 7 guys who were enjoying themselves. The next morning I was a bit hung over at breakfast when a guy came and started counting. One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight..

Great a full crew. Into the van.  I said that I was not with the lads and he said. I have to have 8, can you swim? Fantastic, you are a deep sea diver.

It was a baptism of fire, we lost a lot of people in the beginning. But health and safety helped and we were on fantastic money. We would go into Glasgow and go to a gents outfitters and get kitted out then we would drink and carry on until out leave was over. On going back to the rig we would throw the suit away and get another on our return.

Many of the guys bought apartments and installed mistresses who then took the property from them. So I had a wild time and then I looked around and I began to specialise in ( I forget what he did ) This brought me around the world. I have 6 houses, 3 rooms rented and one for me, soon I will retire. 

I will live on my savings and I will always thank my stepfather for throwing me out.