Saturday, July 03, 2010

Happy Fourth of July


Lighthouse cinema whare you will see quality movies, not the blockbuster movies.
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Shaheen from Mauritius its an Arabic name, she tells me to listen to the music from her island, "You will dance for sure"she said

North King St. Cheap service !


I just Googled Kandahar radio for you and you can get it here But you will need speakers on your computer!.

A good joke on the radio. "About my mum, she gets all mixed up with new words, like Al Kiada and Ikea. When we had the sofa delivered she was hiding and then asked me why the Swedish people wanted to kill us all?"

I had a nice bit fun in the newsagents yesterday.
I won €5.00 and having checked it on the small scanner I asked the girl on the desk if she had enough cash for my winnings or should I go to the Lottery headquarters?
She put it into her machine and said. "Its a winner all right, In will have to ask the boss if I can give you that much cash, hold on.
She served the next customer and then said.. No its OK there's a €5 here alright!
A few people in the shop enjoyed the joke..But one day?

I once picked up a guy at the bus station who asked me to take him to the Lottery HQ "Man its only around the corner" I said, but he wanted to be brought in a taxi. When I was 1/2 way through the journey I realized he had won a big prize.
I congratulated him and never heard anything more about him.

Which is how it should be.

If you do win the lotto.
Keep it quiet don't even tell the cat!
But that is another story to tell on another day.

All taxi drivers should have jokes to tell their clients.

Jokes and stories for all occasions.

A guy comes home from a long trip away from his wife.
They have a romantic lunch and off to bed where they have wild sex.
The man falls asleep and when he wakes up he gets dressed and puts €50 on the pillow.
He is just walking out the front door when he realizes what he has done and where he is.
Rushing back to the bedroom he sees that his wife is still asleep and he tries to get back into the bed, but he finds his €10 change on the pillow !

But real life is stranger than fiction!

One of the guys was telling me that he got a radio call to collect 5 people from and apartment complex the other day.
When he entered the complex he rang to get an exact location and to tell them that he was there,
When he went around the corner there was a girl waving him down. She jumped in and said I'm going to Phibsboro.
You came out here very fast, where are the other 4 people?
What do you mean? I just stopped you now.
Look I'm booked for 5 people,so get out.
With that she stood up and took off her dress and sat back down wearing nothing but a small pair of panties !

So the story unfolds.

The 5 people come out and see a naked girl on the back seat of their taxi!

What the hells going on?

So the taxi driver explains how she got in and then stripped off when he said he was booked..

Then a police car pulls up.

"Is there a problem here driver?"
A female garda gets out of the police car and sees the naked girl and demands an explanation.
So then the female garda gets into the taxi and bitch slaps the girl.

"What in hells name do you think you are doing? Put your fucking clothes you stupid bitch! then she gives her another slap!"

So she gets dressed among the crying and sobbing..where are you going?
Me phone won't work I don't know.
So she handed the phone to the driver who dismantles it to find that the chip is in the wrong way around. When this is corrected she makes a call, Right its *********** St.
So off went the 6 of them.

When she arrived at the address she ripped off all her clothes and ran down the street naked shouting
"Here I am honey"
Her boyfriend paid the taxi though the driver felt that they should have been paying them after such a show.

You can't be too careful though.

Drivers! Lydil are selling Dictaphones for around €20.
Imagine a case of he said, she said?"
Now imagine if you had taped it?

Whether this story is gospel or not we all have had really strange things happen to us at one time or another. Some funny, others tragic others still really scary..Remember 2 years ago or so a taxi picked up a guy and an assassin shot the passinger 20 times or more through the passinger door without hitting the driver.
The hire purchase company took the taxi back and left the driver with a big bill.

Sorry on moving the post forward a comment was lost, you are just too fast 4 me.

3 comments:

  1. Great stories! I think you 100% right about the Lotto; I have no idea why anybody would decide to tell people they had lots of cash! You'd just be waiting for the doorbell every day from your 7th cousin or someone from school 20 years ago.

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  2. I've heard winning the lottery makes most people miserable and they run through the money really fast because everyone shows at their door with their hand out. Sad really.

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  3. Great stuff. thanks for the reference in your earlier post! keep the good stuff coming.

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