Friday, July 01, 2022

Take time off now boss

 So I came home the other day and with a cough, nothing worse. In the morning I took a covid test and guess what? I have joined the club. Yes I am sure that I am Covid Positive...I am fine, just a cough and a bit of asthma.

I am changing my car and I need to have the meter changed over and do the many things that they ask you to do. While I was collecting forms at the NCT in Balllymun there was a Chinese lad standing to my left with a tester." No that insurance cert is out of date. Renew it and come back" He was shocked and it took him more than 20 minutes before he realized that it would cost him another €70 for a new appointment plus another day off work.

Any right thinking person would pass the car out and hold on to the paperwork till the lad came back.

These guys have no soul.

For myself they failed me for the luggage blind that goes on the back of the Prius. I would have had it in his hand in 20 mins. But no "Do not pass go and pay €70"

One hero was a neighbor of mine John who brought his mother in laws car in for testing. He worked at the airport and backed the car into the hanger, there he tested the emissions. All go with nothing to worry about.

But in the testing facility if failed on the emissions. When he asked that they test it on another machine he was told to fuck off.

But he worked at the airport and rang the head of compliance who asked to speak to the operator.

His attitude changed and the car was re tested and it passed.

They called in that evening and reviewed the footage of the CCTV cameras and proved that the equipment had not been calibrated for weeks. They were asked to bring back all the failed cars and re test them free and they were issued with a nice fine and the operator was requested not to be so cheeky next time.

John told me that he was very nervous going back but with a smile he said

"I guess there was no hard feelings"

Its nice when you can beat the bully.

Saturday, June 25, 2022

Rima Baransi dancing in Trieste, Italy with violinist Ivo Remenec [Horiz...


Well folks today my wife has caught the dreaded Covid. But I am still negative.
Saturday can be a strange day, with so many workers off your workload and pattern of work changes.
By chance I picked up a young lady going to the medical center in Smithfield. We spoke of many things and when I asked her where she was from she said Tullamore, a short while later I asked if she had foreign blood? Yes her father was Cuban,yes she was a looker all right that Latino blood was throbbing through her body. She told me that she was going to become  dancer. I wished her the best of luck with that.
I asked her if she ever saw the footage of the girl dancing? There it is now.
A couple going on a cruise via Barcelona. Lucky feckers.

Then a solicitor from Derry. My brother did law in Derry and after he got a really guilty guy off he gave up criminal law.
My client had worked in America and in different jurisdictions. It is a fact that the best case, totally watertight can be sunk by a simple error.
He had a case of incest and the daughter had had a child and now when his granddaughter was 6 or 7 he started to have intercourse with her. We had him, all the evidence and then in walked this barrister from the UK Sir *******. He requested that we move into chambers where he unloaded an atomic bomb on our case. The arresting Garda had not read him his rights before arresting him.
Case dismissed and no chance of arresting him again.
Its called double jeopardy.
What really annoyed the passenger was the attitude of the Garda who just shrugged his shoulders as if it was nothing at all.  

Boy did he have a taxi story for us all.
Coming back to Dublin early one morning at around 4 am, there was only a few taxis around and he noticed this guy hanging back, when the driver saw the suit and the briefcase he decided that he had caught his man and pulled over to him. Kilmainham said my man. Do you know where it is?
Sure man. and they set off. The solicitor decided to test him and closed his eyes. 
When he woke up they were in Naas. A hell of a row followed and rather than pull into the Garda station in Naas he went back for Dublin. The driver was very aggressive and as they reached Kilmainham he told the driver to take the lane way which leads to the Garda station. At this point he pressed the panic button on an app that solicitors have on their phones to give them instant Police protection.
He told the driver that the Garda station was his flat complex.
Then the fun began with the €600 taxi fair. 2 Garda just walked over and arrested the driver on the spot and the Garda rang him later to say that they had been trying to break this scam for a few years

I would say that the solicitor has a good few yarns to tell

Wednesday, June 15, 2022

Episode I -- TELEMACHUS Presented by David Norris



Happy Bloomsday
and anyone who has read it is a liar.

Not quite
But david Norris will give it a good shake.

Friday, June 10, 2022

Toyota Corolla commercial its a trap


.I just saw that this bit did not publish, so I published it again. A good one for sure.

I am taking the whole day off while I prepare to do my income tax and change my new car into a taxi.
Its not easy, for example the car has tinted windows and the taxi regulator says "Clear glass only"

Look if you are in Dublin and in need of a good car look at CT Cars Raheny farm Lusk K45 TX85
Phone 087 250 4409. Tell him that John the taxi man sent you.

That said there are moments while driving around which put your life into perspective and you then feel happy with your lot. A woman from Kildare got into the car with a mentally handicapped child going to a hospital.and after chatting for a while I told her about the blog and I gave her the business card which starts off with "somewhere over the rainbow"
God that was my husbands wish to have that song played at his funeral.
Then she sang the praises of her child who was around 12 years old, "They said that our son would be dead by the time he was 3. Look at him now"We adopted him and he is the light of my life.
Every day is a challenge. 
But she is a champion fighter and I hope that God will look out for her.

We have Covid in the house now and that means that we are not going to our granddaughters christening.
Well there is no point in spreading it on. 
So my son is on a died of toast, Pizza, Pancakes and anything else that will fit under the door.

Change of car.

 there is a rule that taxis cannot be older than 9 years old.

We got an extra year on account of the Covid. But the time is up for my car.

Fair play to my wife she scanned the internet and came up with a fresh Prius cx. Thats the one that is wider  and it has a higher back with extra boot space.

Lots of work to be done, meter out of old car and into the new car also loads of paperwork,

I need the rest I should enjoy the new wheels. I will get it wrapped and the old car stripped of its branding.

Here is something that you might not think of, but.

You need to put €100 away every week so that you can buy a new car when it is time to do it, or God forbid that your engine might blow. Cash is king so you have to be ready to jump.

This game is based on luck, like fishing. You have to look for the work and it could be anywhere.

I was at Connelly train station today and it was slow, so I crossed over to the bus station and in 5  minutes I was on my way to the airport. A €20 job.

Other times you might wait and wait to get a €7 job only to pick up another job worth €20 or €30 just like that.

As you might know. I have a waving cat sitting in my bay window and he passes good luck to me every day.

So I have very little to say. But I will be busy for the next few weeks.

Tuesday, May 31, 2022

John the wing commander RIP

 The old soldiers are starting to fall and I just got word that the wing commander has died.

We worked in the international telephone exchange when the phones were so different.

Once he confided in me about something that still haunts me to this day.

He was dropping a fare off in the middle of a modern housing estate and when he turned around to close the boot a kid of around 7 years old ran up to him and said "Please mister help me, take me back to my mother and father" Just then a man with a very heavy foreign accent came over and said to John that "he is always doing this" and he dragged the boy away.

John said that the boys English was perfect and the father had almost no English.

So he went to the Garda station where the Garda said that he would make a report and investigate the matter.

Later on John went back 2 times only to be told that they were still investigating.

Nothing ever came of it.

I feel Johns pain

I was heading to Heuston station turning into St.Johns rd. when I saw a carer walking with a mentally handicapped girl. As he stopped to cross the road and put his right hand over her shoulder and put it onto her right breast. She squirmed with disgust and without going to the train station I did a loop and went into the John Of Gods facility to confront the bastard. I spent a good 1/2 hour there asking for someone in charge, all to no avail. I wrote to them twice and I wrote to the Garda commissioner 3 times.

The only reply I got was a phone call 

"We would have to see the sexual assault before we could do anything"  

I hope he never gets a job with the murder squad.

The police here are hopeless. Unless you break the speed limit or the traffic lights.

But for everything else they are a waste of space.

John had one great story.

He was going from Heuston station to the 4 courts with a client.

As he went through the lights at Blackhall Place the lights turned amber as he went through.

A siren sounded and the Garda on a motorbike blocked them in.

Whares the fire said the Garda.

John said What did you say?

Ah Jesus he's deaf as well as blind said the Garda.

The passenger leaned forward and asked him why he had not stopped the other 2 cars which had gone through after us.

This is none of you fucking buisness said the garda.

The passenger produced his business card and said.

This is my exactly my business the passenger told him that he had an appointment with the attorney general in 15 minutes. Write your ticket or not but shut your mouth, you have not heard the last of this.

He told them to drive on.

John went to thank the passenger but was shushed for a second.

Then the passenger gave John his business card with the number on the Gardas tunic and the motorbike number. 

Now he is attached to this station. go there and tell the superintendent  what happened and he gave him an extra €20 to cover his time.

John knew the super when he met him from golf in Spain and he showed him the card.

Not again. Said the superintendent.

He lifted the phone and said Tell Garda Malone to come to my office now. 

There is no one dead but I need him now.

They were having coffee when the knock came to the door and this bull of a man thundered in. 

When he saw John he shrank 4 inches.

You have been given many many chances, each time the power goes to your head.

Put your warrant card on my desk and the keys of your motorbike, go down and change out of that uniform, we will be contacting you with the paperwork later on.

That was it, the monster was slain.

Monday, May 30, 2022

May 25/ 2008

 Time marches on for sure and now I find myself standing in 2022.

Why will I remember that date for so long? At the time there seemed to be nothing special, much later all was revealed.

An American guy at arrivals was asking each car in front of me something and then moving on to the next car. I was around sixth and the question?

Will you take American dollars? Yes ! Great, move up to the door and I will get the rest of my crew. A woman a boy and a girl all piled in. 

The next big bonus question.

Where are we going?

The K club came the answer.

I will show you the sheet so that you know I said. Its €80.

Thats $100 20 40 60 80 100 and off we went.

He was a really interesting man, he was playing with something, I thought that it was a game boy. No it was a Blackberry, the forerunner of the modern phone.

Thought I knew him. But he assured me that he was nobody famous, I did not think that he was famous, but I could not place him.

Its a good spin to the K club and we talked about most things.

I told him about the drug addict who told me of a story worthy of Bram Stoker the author of Dracula. He had a note book and kept notes. Wow he said if I live to be 1,000 I could never have thought of that.

He asked ma if I had seen any movies lately?

I had seen 2 No country for old men and Traffic. Both films about drugs.

One scene from Old country he walks across the desert with the bags of money. What a shot I said.. Yes that was done with such and such a lens with the aperture set at this.

No matter how it was done it was great.

I told him about a shoot that I was driving on with a Japanese pop star. The director was the boss and he never spoke to his crew. He was God.

Princess Hya (The King of Jordans daughter) was the main focus and I was sitting on a bale of straw chatting to her, otherwise she would have walked away. I had no idea who she was.

On the was back the cameraman told me that the shot would never be used as the wrong lens was used. He knew exactly which lens to use but he could not overrule the director.

My man said a very wise thing. Movies are made in cooperation, each person has a skill and when they work together the best result comes around.

I told him about John Hubbard in the distant past. He is a casting director and we would go around giving out scripts. It was some job to get those lazy people to answer the door to get the script from us. The change from "What the hell are you banging on my door at this hour of the morning" and "Its Hubbard Casting. we have a script for you"

So we arrived at the K club. It means Kildare club

John will you come back this evening and bring us back to Dublin and then back to the K club?  No that would be 4 journeys for me and I would only get paid for 2. They have a beautiful limo here its a Mayback and that will bring you up and down in style.

If you measure one leg of the journey I will give you 5 times that amount. The biggest taxi fare of my life. No I am sorry Its my wife's birthday and she would kill us both.

I will just stick this bit in here. the $100 was given to a magician from Las Vegas to help pay for the operation of his baby daughters heart. I met him a year later and asked how the baby was. I am the person who gave you the $100 for her operation

"That was a wonderful gift I put it into a safety deposit box and I will give it to her when she is 18"
So that night he took the limo to Dublin and appeared on the Late Late show and was introduced as Stephen Spielberg. Where he gave me a special thank you.

He is a clever guy, if I had known who he was I would have been asking him about ET and wondering if he had contacted him again or I might have been lounge tied.

One little extra thing. He asked me what was my favorite movie was. Without a doubt it has to be Cinema Paradiso and we both talked about it. He loved it as well and he admitted that it was his most favorite movie as well.We both had the directors cut.

Anyhoo as they say in Canada.
The book can be bought or downloaded from Amazon
The steering wheel university by Paul Malone

Monday, May 16, 2022

Vintage Checker Cab Driver Interview


Hi folks. We are heading 1/2 way through and the tourists are back in town.
All systems are go.(I hope)
So I was too slow to stop a tourist being scammed yesterday. She came out of a hotel and asked to be brought to St.Vincests hospital, but she had not gone to the first car. The driver was reading the paper and as I tapped on his window to get out of his car as she had a suitcase, before he reacted the receptionist came out and said "Madame I have ordered you a taxi, it will arrive in a minute" and she brought her back in. 
This was at the Hilton garden hotel. The scam is either she receives  a backhander from a taxi company or it will be from an individual driver. Either way the customer gets overcharged. 
Perhaps the Hilton Hotel doesn't care?.Who knows.
It has been widely circulated that the manager of the King Sitric restaurant in Howth is encouraging patrons to take a ride to the airport in his special SUV for €60. But the proper cost in a taxi is more like €30. But the taxi carries public liability insurance. The other car is not insured to carry passengers for hire. But the police and the powers that be are refusing to act.
I love stories in which the people in charge have been warned many times of an impending disaster,
"WE knew nothing about any danger warnings" 
Then they are handed all the evidence. No hiding place now.

A phone was dropped under the front seat of the taxi and the owner made contact. Perhaps a 4 mile drive to bring it back. He took it back and said thanks.
Not 10c for my time.
C'est La vie

Are there angels that move among us?
An American girl got into the taxi going to Rathfarnham.
She was a special needs teacher working with severely autistic children, non verbal etc.
She was from New York and her children had just gone through confirmation and she was so happy for them. 
As well as New York she had lived in Hawaii where she adopted a stray dog.
How to bring the dog to Ireland ? It took time ,shots and money. 
Nearly $2000 to be exact.
I very much got the impression that she has no rich daddy behind her, so it was all her own doe.
She had been sitting in the assassins seat directly behind me and when we arrived she was paying by card so I stood out to stretch my back and then I saw her.
Such beautiful pale blue eyes and such a caring wonderful person.
I really believe that she is an angel sent to help us all.
I should have brought her home to meet my son.