The new Irish

 My wife took me shopping and when we reached the checkout she remembered something else.

She left me at the checkout and I started to talk to a Romanian girl. Her English was remarkable but I picked up a slight accent. She told me that when she was growing up she went to an English school.

There is something about her that says inelegance right up front. I told her that the new Irish who are coming has been the making of Ireland both in eagerness to work and the standard of education. 

She told me that she was very glad of the recognition and told me about her last job in the UK. She had worked hard and now was almost in charge of the company she was in. She was in charge of 40 workers and more or less the running of the business. After 3 years without a raise she collared her boss and he looked her in the eye and said 

"You are hardly worth the wages you are on" 

It was like a slap on the face. that day I wrote 3 letters. 2 days one of our competitors brought me in for a chat.  I got the job straight away on twice my current pay.

My boss and his son loved playing golf and that is what was important to them ,so I am not sure if they read my 2 weeks notice letter. 10 days later I told the boss that he should be training my replacement, sure that would be no trouble...I was gone with no handshake and my new boss welcomed me with open arms. 

Back at the old job things fell apart in spectacular fashion. After 2 weeks 20 of the staff were gone and then the company went bang... No more time for golf.. Time to take lessons in communication.

She was a really bright girl and thank God the migrants are here 

Abuse from the bank

 | had a corn which was annoying me so I took a razor blade and cut it off.

I time long ago comes back to me when I do this. I was in Sicili and that old corn was giving me trouble and I went into a chemist and asked for a Bohemian blade (one edge and a rigid back) He went off and came back an a few seconds. "What are you using it for?" when I told him you would think that I had pointed a gun at him.. "No No Noway",,,#, So he sold me different stuff,

I still cut the buggers off. A friend of mine who died aged 103 told me that she had never even seen a corn. So off with the socks and I explained what I would do,,,

When Mabel was around 98 the local rector called in to check up on her. After a bit of a chat the rector mentioned that they were building a new church hall and that they were looking for donations. Her reply still makes me smile to this day. " You sold the old church hall and all the land and you got more than 1 1/2 million for that. How could you be short of money?"  I wish I was there to see the Reverent s face.

 

The church held the Irish people in a fierce stranglehold in the past. Mother and baby homes, Magdalene laundry's,and borstals where children were beaten without mercy. 

I had a guy who told me that he was 8 before he was adopted by and American couple who were of German origin.  You have no idea what it was like to reach the age of 8 without anyone saying, you did great, well done, come here till I give you a hug.

He did great in the end but I will respect his privacy and tell you no more. 

This would nearly make a chapter in my next book.

We bought and sold our house and  my wages were paid into the PTSB and then a payment was paid into the AIB to pay the mortgage.. Then one day my transfer did not happen and I got a call from a man shouting.."Hey buddy whats the fuck are you doin, ya didn't pay yer mortgage. I asked who that was the fucking bank ya bollix.  And so on and on. 

When he ended the call I was shaken and my wife thought that it was a joke. But as the days passed I decided to take action and complain. I wrote a letter No reply, I wrote a second letter and handed it in, Still no reply. I told a friend of mine whose wife worked in the bank. She rang me straight away.

Write to the banking Ombudsman Tell them the whole story, dates and times. 

2 days later  the reply came, just to straighten up a few points.

A week later a letter arrived with a check for €1200 and an apology.

I had not realized that my friends wife was a director of the AIB bank and she told me that she went into the meeting room to listen to my case.  The abuser had done it as a joke and as they were playing back the tape you could hear the other people in the office laughing.  He was the nephew of the manager and it was him who got the young lad the job.

His uncle was visibly dying in front of everyone. Mary told me that if I had complained further I would have got much more money.

Happy Paddys day

 Yes it is something which is celebrated all over the world.

If you are going to the big parade wrap up well.

God bless you all and a happy St. Patricks day to you. 

Blackpool MAGIC convention

 I have been to this a few times and every time I go I say never again until the next time.

It was really cold, though I wrapped up well I have picked up a hell of a chest cold.

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It was great to see that Weatherspoons pubs are still doing business with a pint at £2 or so. Anyhow if you just go to YouTube and put in Blackpool magic convention it is all there.

One act worth looking at is mind 2 mind a mentalist act. 

The 2 girls who did quick change for Penn and Teller were there... "Really spectacular. " two costumes in a second. I thought it might be a camera trick. But it was for real.

They developed an app for the convention which shows every performer, when you click on the artistes photo the biography pops open 59 different acts.  

If you can access movies there is a movie called Funny Bones. Its set in Blackpool, but I live that movie. 

 So tired when I  came home !!!! NEVER AGAIN

 

Wrexham north Wales

 As I wandered through life I worked in a racing stable as a stable lad. Riding out different horses and mucking out. Every month or six weeks we would take a few horses out for a race.

There was an older horse in the stable called Eternal.. This was the horse that won the Grand National once.

Well the pay was not  great and I went over to working in a plastics factory. There was one guy working there who had been an engineer in the army. He was a real go getter and a hard worker. His regiment was based in Wrexham and they were the actual regiment who fought the Zulu warriors in the movie Zulu.

Taffy asked me to join him in a project which would make us a good wad of money.

We had to extrude sheets of plastic of uniform thickness and density and while it was molten we embedded fiber glass cloth with a loose weave into the plastic. So we worked hard and got it flawless.

We won the contract which involved 24/7 production and keeping it well monitored.

The plastic sheeting was to be used in the making of a tunnel.. The Mersey tunnel. Taffy went to Liverpool on his motorbike and spoke to the engineers at his own expense and things moved on.

At around 6 weeks into the project we were met be security guards at the gate and escorted to our lockers and walked back out the gate.   We were all sacked.

Taffy the foreman went to meet his colleagues in Liverpool and came back to Wrexham a few days later.

What they had done was to give the contract to an Italian company at half the cost. Taffy said that he opened some of the containers and took out the new sheeting and it was pure crap.

Tafffy  demanded a meeting with top management plus directors from London. "What you have done is to introduce materials which are far inferior to what we were supplying.You signed a contract to supply good to the spec. supplied in the contract. When our sheeting is used up total work will stop.

 I have spoken to the management team and your contract will leave you liable for millions in damages"

He said I will be back in one hour, I will leave you a space to talk, When he came back into the room he dropped a bomb.

The managers who arranged this are to be sacked straight away. The supply chain will be managed by me.

We will only return to work provided we get 4 times the hourly pay, weekly in advance.

Remember gentlemen this was all your fault, even if we start in the morning there may be delays.

The word came the next day and we put our heads down and completed the task over the next months.

That night in the Greyhound bar there was mighty celebration. 

I went back to Ireland for another few years. 

 

I should have bought a suit.

 I know that this is an old story but it keeps coming back to me, so I will share it with you again.

The well dressed well spoken English man was heading in from the airport. I asked him what he did for a living and he said that he was a professor of economics in Cambridge university. A clever boy so, Any tips?. Ireland has created a very positive tax base for internet companies and there will be a huge demand for property, Where should I look? he said.

Clontarf I said, close to town with good connections to the city center. Do you know a good estate agent? To cut a long story short he gave me his business card and asked to be called tomorrow evening.

So the next day I went to Gallagher Quigley at the bottom of the Malahide rd, As I walked through the door the secretary jumped up and blocked me. She then pushed me out and locked the door. She waved at me to go away. Mr Quigley had his back to me in the inside office.

So I went away,

I Raheny there was another office Douglas, Newman and Good, so I went there where the guy who met me knew me as his kids were going to the same school as mine. I explained what was going on and then he said "Give me your number, I will look after everything"

3 days later he rang me back to say that he had spoken to him and mailed off a pile of property details.

A few days after that he rang to say that the guy was coming, that night when the guy went back home the auctioneer rang to say that he had paid deposits on 2 2bedroom apartments and a 4 bedroom house.

He came back a few weeks later and bought more property,

A few years I met the auctioneer in the supermarket and he told me that he retied from the auctionerig business and was acting as an agent for the property company, he thanked me and all that I could say was

You are just lucky that I was not wearing a suit that day. 

I also had this happen to me when the owner of EBay was looking for a place where he could give his a special treat. I went to a hotel who did a tasting menu and asked to speak to a manager. 

The word came back that they were too busy to see me.. Too busy to take a e30,000 booking 

Handing in my license

 Tomorrow will be a red letter day.

I will be handing in my PSV (Taxi driving license) it is the end of an era.

I have not driven my taxi for 3 years now since my son took over the job. 

So much red tape goes on and there is so much crap that you have to put up with.

Years ago when the "Regulators" arrived you would be at the rank at Heuston train station and they would pull up at the top of the queue. Then they would get out and put on reflective jackets, pick up their clip boards and torches. While they were at that 10 or 12 illegal drivers would drive away unchallenged. What a waste of time.

One guy who had been working hard over Christmas was called into the carriage office for overcharging. It was mid week and the customer makes this journey frequently.

Can you explain ? It was not at night rate or Sunday rate. You were overcharging him.

Then the taxi drivers face lit up 25th December!!!! Christmas day rate.

The officials could not have been more polite and apologetic and they even offered him a cup of tea.

I know I told you this before but. The son of a taxi driver hailed down a taxi in Howth going to Tallagh, he noticed that  the drivers ID did not match the driver. He said nothing as he just wanted to go home. 

He told the driver to show down 3 or 4 times. Coming into Marino there was a Garda checkpoint with flashing lights and the driver made a sudden turn on to the Malahide rd.

He was spotted and the Garda gave chase. A couple of miles later they were caught and the driver arrested, no driving license no insurance  and no PSV licence.

The passenger went to court on the day and he was asked to comment. 

He spoke "Me Lord I want to outline a few points.

I am an accident claims investigator, I go to crash sites and look at the aftermath of awful incidents. His brother gave him the taxi knowing that he was not insured to drive it, he did not even have a basic license.

The driver was here waiting for political asylum, I propose that the driver be deported and that the taxi be crushed and the license be revoked. This is a very serious breach of law.

The judge reserved judgment until a later date. 

Stardust reborn

 Here in Dublin on St.Valentines night a fire broke out in the Stardust ballroom.

48 young people died and a generation of people who lived in that area are still traumatized by the happenings on that night. 

The fire doors were locked or blocked and tales came out about things that happened.

One girl got out and then remembered her new coat....She went back in and died.

One young buck hot wired a car and smashed through the fire doors saving many lives.

I was in a house in Coolock when the woman of the house said "Heres my daughter coming don't react to anything she will do, she doesn't know"  She came in and tapped on every window of the house. The mother said that she had been in the Stardust that night and she is like this since, plus nightmares all the time.

I was in Blackpool at the worlds biggest magicians convention years later.

A lecture was about to start and I went to the venue and believe it or not there was around 1,000 people in a big room with 4 fire escapes all blocked up. I couldn't stay and when I came home I rang the Police in Blackpool.  "Oh no you are on to the wrong department. you need to call"...........

I cut her off.. You are the person I called so you should act.

 Did you ever hear of the Stardust Disaster??  .... No she said. Ask your colleagues.

The ball is now in your court.

When I went back the following year there was 3 or 4 inspectors going around with clip boards.

My son said that I   was a busybody causing trouble, but I would make an effort to save a life. 

 

You would have to wonder how many people should have noticed that that ski lodge in Switzerland was unsafe, yet they said nothing.