Do your job and save a life.

 My middle son has 3 kids and he lives in Northern Ireland.

He has 3 kids and we try to drive up to see them as often as we can.

Well I saw this thing happen twice and decided to do something about it.

A truck was driving along with a very high load. The load was of pieces of metal chopped up and the load was stacked right to the edge of the container.There was a net at the front of each load but the nets were not deployed.

This was spotted again on another trip as well.  Imagine if a flat piece of metal that had another bit the size of a hammer resting on it and the bar got launched at 60 MPH hitting the windscreen  of a car coming the other way.The other car is doing 8o MPH so we have an impact of  140 MPH.

So I wrote !!!! no reply. I wrote again, still no reply.

I hope I don't have to write to say "I told you so" 

It reminds my of the East wall rd. There was a road Alfie Byrne rd going off to the right which became a road of priority.

The other road was very badly marked and when I wrote I was told that any driver who passed the yield sign would not know the rules of the road. The crash happened and I sent a copy of their reply back.

All this anxiety goes back to when I got my first driving license and drove my daddy up to   Traynors scrap yard in county Armagh. When Mr Traynor heard I had my first trip on my license.

He took me through the wrecks, bent steering wheels, blood and hair on the windscreens, to cut a long story short he brought me over to a good looking car, no one ever wants to see this car again.

It turned out that they were driving along and someone was holding a baby on the back seat. They lost control of the car the wonderful baby was killed.

No one ever wants to see that car again. 

Years later his grandson took me out the back to see a yellow sports car. This car is for shredding as well. We don't know what he was doing but he turned the car over and his head was cut clean off.

Police inaction is a curse. I reported a girl who was mentally handicapped being sexually abused. My complaints went right up to the Garda commissioner. All I got was unless we caught the person there was nothing we could do. I you don't look you will not see anything.

Then a friend of mine was dropping off some people from the airport when a little boy ran up to him. Please mister help me. Bring me back to my mother and father please. Just then a Romanian man ran over and scooped him up. He OK he like this, he play games!The boy had blonde hair and spoke perfect English and the "Father" had very little English and a dark complexion.

John went to the Garda and they said "Unless we get a missing persons report there is nothing we can do"But they would not look. 

 So we decided to go back and kidnap the young lad, After a while there  one of the neighbors told us that the family had moved away, suddenly.

To this day we believe that he was kidnapped. 

, 

 

Big questions.

 As we went along I liked to have a bit of fun and ask trivial questions.

Is a Slug a homeless Snail ?

Why is a banana like a politician ?

Well you will never find a straight one. 

How do you know when a politician is lying? 

His lips are moving.

Is a cauliflower a cabbage that went to collage and he got a bigger brain ?

And lastly the man who invented the flat pack and developed it into Ikea.

His name was Ingvar Kampard  from Sweden.

The Swedish government as a  reward elected him to head department of industry and commerce.

But alas he never took up his post.

Do you know why?

You see,he could not assemble his cabinet.

Have a good day. 

 

You know karma is a wonderful thing.

I had a very abusive couple going to the airport one Sunday.

Why are you going this way?

Drive faster or we will miss our flight.

Even the choice of being thrown out did not cool them down.

At  the airport they were still cussing away. 

Our whole day has been fucked up thanks to you.

My day was fucked up when I got up and found that the clocks had changed.

I will never forget the change

"Wats ya takin about ya feckin moron ?"

The clocks went forward an hour last night !!

The dawning of reality was spectacular.

I also got the chance to say the words.

Who's the moron now? 

 

Thinking posative

 So I has this man in the taxi who said early on in the journey. 

"If I was starting my life again I would love to be a taxi driver"

He spoke about all the positive aspects to the job, and I countered with the drunk and abusive people.

" But you have the power! The journey ends here, have a nice day". I did it 3 times, the second time the guy offered to pay me €100 on top of the fare. No go. 

That man turned out to be the most influential person in my life. We stayed in touch until he died.

His name was Charles Feeney known as Chuck. He inverted duty free shopping and  became a billionaire and he used all his money to help the world. There is a book about him called the billionaire who wasn't.

Its a good read.  Anyhow open up your minds and look at things differently.

A word of warning to the wise. Look at your dash cam. Mine fell down in the heat and when I was putting it back I noticed "chip full". I asked my expert and he told me that it was not set to record in a loop. I would have fared badly when the other guy said 50/50.

Another one is to photocopy the receipt when you buy TVs or Air Firers etc. I was in Lidl  and there was 2 Spanish girls crying their eyes out. It was still in the box and it never worked! No receipt no return.... So I brought them outside and we came up with a plan.

I bought an air fryer and the next day we brought their fryer back with my receipt. 

Now I wish that I had brought back my one for a return of my money, they are not great.

Here is a very interesting one.

a GIRL WAS RAPED BY HER BOYFRIEND AND SHE WENT TO A LOCAL GARDA STATION. WHERE THE SERGEANT SPOKE TO HER.

WHEN  SHE CAME OUT HER FRIEND TOOK HER HOME FOR A CUP OF TEA AND A CHAT.   IT TURNED OUT THAT DURING THE INVESTIGATION HE SAID, "SURE YOU MUST HAVE ENJOYED IT! "

THE INTERVIEW SHOULD HAVE BEEN GONE BY A FEMALE GARDA AND AS THE LAYERS OF THE ONION FELL AWAY THE TRUTH CAME OUT.

IT WAS THE SERGEANTS BROTHER. 

I THINK HE IS FILLING SHELVES IN TESCO NOW.

i DON'T KNOW WHAT IS HAPPENING WITH MY SETTINGS, BUT LIKE PATTON

"I WILL BE BACK" 

 

 

NO REPLY

 There was a lady who spoke French, she lived around the corner from me and people said that she was odd. I had a passenger in the taxi one day who needed some tuition and I put her on to the lady. Later the girl told me that she was so lovely and she would not even take a Euro for the 3 sessions that she had.

One day the neighbors noticed that the lights were on in the sitting room all night and when they knocked on the door there was no reply. One of them went to the Garda and knocked on the door and got no reply either, so they went away. Then there was an awful smell and when they broke in her decomposing body was there in front of the TV. Dead for weeks.

No fowl play was the verdict, but here is the strange thing.

No friends rang her or noticed that she was missing. You step out for an hour and the calls would be coming. No friends or relatives stepped forward and the house remained empty for a couple of years,

The Corporation stepped in and stripped the house, sold the car and cut the grass. 

Now the house is up for sale, she is gone for around 3 years now. 

VERY ODD, A LOVELY LOVELY LADY Take your pick

But a complete mystery 

12 th of July

 A big day in Ulster tomorrow as they celebrate the 12th of July with bonfires 40 ft. high made from pallets and marching bands all over the place.

Most people take the day off and head to the seaside. 

I must keep a note book and then I can organize my thoughts.

An elderly couple went to the doctor together and the doctor declared them in good health. There is one thing that you can do to help your lives run more smooth. Saying that he handed them 2 note books with pencils stuck into the back. If you are asked to pick up a message just write it down and there will be no problems with your memory,

So they are at home that evening and they talked about the doctors visit and they sat that there will be no need for the note book.  

Watching TV the husband asked  if his wife needs anything from the kitchen?  Yes indeed she says, there is ice cream in the fridge, get me 2 scoops and put a strawberry on top/  No bother 2 scoops and a strawberry on top.

He is in there quite a while and when he comes back in he has a full breakfast on a tray. 2 sausages bacon and fried eggs.  

She laughs and says. 

That doctor is right you really are slipping. 

Why are you saying that?

You forgot me toast ????? 

 

I saw that joke again on YouTube...Ronald Regan, he was a really funny guy.

Funny is a different way from the present guy. 

Wasting loads of oil ?

 The other day I was making a stew and I found that we had no onions. So off to Freds shop and I got some. I was chopping up one of them when the label caught my eye.

Where were they from? Ireland? Spain ? No they were from Senegal...Its a few countries south of Morocco with Cape Verde islands off the coast.

You might think that the goods could have been used locally instead of dragging them half way around the world. Did you ever buy  green beans in Lidl or Aldi ? Morocco or Egypt for example.

Well today I bought mangetout (beans) All the way from Peru! Have we all gone mad ? 

As my kids often say. "If you feel so badly about it you should write a letter to them"  

I know if you have read a lot of this blog you will have heard this story before.We had a montage with the AIB bank. Our wages were paid into a different bank and a direct debit sent on when the payment was due. Everything going on fine until one day the transfer did not happen.

No phone call or letter. Then one day this chap came on the line, "Whats going on ya bollox? Ya haven't paid yer mortgage," He went on calling me names, really rough stuff.

My wife told me to write a letter which I did. No reply.

10 days later I handed a letter to the banks HQ. No reply

Then I handed another letter into my local bank.

Here is the interesting twist. The wife of a friend of mine worked in the bank and she told me to write to the banking ombudsman. Giving times and also what happened. 24 hours later they rang me back to clarify the way that things had gone.

Well 2 weeks later I got a check for €1400.

Later I was talking to Mary and she told me that she had sat in on the enquirey and it was dramatic to sat the least.  The tape of the call was played and the young lad was sacked on the spot. His uncle had vouched for him for the job and Mary told me that the poor man nearly had a heart attack.

I found out later that Mary is a director of the bank although she just monitored the complaint.

One other thing that she told me was that I should appeal the settlement. 3 unanswered letters ??

Doomsday book !

 We went to Spain a few years ago and we went from Madrid to Barcelona by train.

Train is a really great way to go and after you settle down you can chat to the fellow passengers.

One guy I will never forget told me about security and how pickpockets can really spoil your entire holiday. He said that copies of their passports were stored on the web (Whatever that is) and he had a little black book which had all the details of their credit cards and the help numbers.

I asked him what would happen if he lost the black book.  No problem at all. I will show you,

Each card has 4 banks of 4 numbers, as I am writing it into the book I increase the second digit by 2 and reverse the following 2 digits. Useless to anyone not knowing the code.

Now we have guys who are carrying card readers who scan your cards in your pocket, You must have a RFI card holder from Amazon, While you are at it get a key box and eve a blocker for when the key is in your pocket. Did you know that car thieves can scan your keys from outside your front door?

Here is one for you.

You get into your Prius and start the car. You then pass it over to your sister to go to Limerick.

She stops the car to go to the shops,. She has no key to lock it ! Then she needs to start the car and no key!

She phones you up OOPs you have the key in your pocket !

I am told that this works. Press the phone to the key and your sister presses record for 1 minute.

Now tell her to hold the phone while in normal mode and the signal will start the car.

It is really mad what the modern cars will do. My Tesla makes Americano coffee ready at 7.30 every morning,

I will finish with this one. 

There is small row of new house just at the bottom of Vernon Ave. There was a man and he had locked his keys in his new car. He asked me if I knew someone who could help and I rang him. The deal was £120 and if he could not open it there would be no charge..No charge for time.

He was adamant that his new car would not be damaged. The locksmith looked through the windows and then said "money up front". He went back to his van and took out a box the size of a cigar box. Then he pulled up the aerial and turned a few dials. In less than a minute it opened.

"I am not giving you £120 for that" He put the keys back into the car between the front seats and locked the car. Off he went and the search for another guy went on I think for sure it was a lot more expensive.

The locksmith told me that device had cost him more than £2,000 and he had to produce his license. 

 Keys, Keys ,Keys If I know who invented them I would lock him up and THROW AWAY THE KEY

 

Wonderful sunshine at last

 https://youtu.be/vxuvFGbh9TI?si=rVgVvlUKuqtFQk6R

I hope that the link above works, George Burns. 

The song reminds me that I am not as young as I once was. Though I am still here.

So yesterday I was in the Omni shopping center remarking how many units are closed down when I noticed a girl with a fantastic sun tan and I spoke to her. 

She was from Chile and she had the most wonderful beautiful eyes. I remarked about how great they were and she said that she took them from her mother. 

(I didn't drop the line "How can she manage when you took her eyes?")  

But it was time to go. 

There was something special about the shape of her eyes, something kind of Oriental. Then it hit me Aztec blood, how wonderful.

She landed here last night and met me the next day. Pity I didn't give her my number. 

We are blessed that so many good people have come here to work. We were once the nomads of the world looking for work in England, America, Australia and everywhere else.  I picked up 2 girls from the North Pole once. They had met so many Irish that they had to come and see for themselves.

What did they think?   MY GOD such a beautiful country, green with gentle rain. Why would anyone go?

A history lesson followed and they landed at the airport, A big hug and they were on their way,

300 meters down the road a girl waved me down, Where are you from? Terra Del Fugue, The very tip of S.America. 

Taxi drivers should be schooled to tell a few jokes, to lift the mood.

So I went for a few pints the other night and I took the bus into Clearys pub. After a few pints I was heading home. I decided that when I got home I would take my clothes off downstairs and slip up the stairs and into bed. My plan was going well and when I reached the top of the stairs I realized that something was badly wrong.

I was still on the bus ``` Naked on the top deck